They come and go throughout life and very few will actually stay. I have never been a girl with loads of friends and I never will be. To be honest, I quite like having a small group of friends because I can give them more time and cherish them for everything they are.
Something I have learnt recently is that every friendship is different and every person in those friendships are different. How you are with one friend can be completely different with another. You can never predict how a friendship is going to pan out. You may think that you will be friends for the rest of your lives but its important to realise that as you grow and your friendship develops, there will be bumps along the way and sometimes there will be things/moments that happen that will make you less compatible. Thats okay. You can’t be a match with everyone. You have to know someone for a long time to understand exactly what they are like. I’ve known my 2 best friends for almost 5 years years and even now there is still so much to learn about each other.
It can be hard to work out what is the right person to have around you, especially when you have been so close with someone for a long time. I have always been someone you wants to keep hold of every friendship, I don’t want people to dislike me. I know I’m not a bad person. But the truth of the matter is, Im not going to be liked by everyone and someone is going to dislike me for something I have done. You just cant please everyone. I have previously been friends with a girl who I got on so well with and have so many fun drunk memories of nights out and walks along bournemouth beach but it ended up with me being shouted at and made to feel like I was a horrible nasty person when actually all I did was tell her to turn off the shower properly. Often it is one thing that sparks someone into a rage and ends up with them taking it all out on you. The friendship we had was lovely and every memory is still a good memory, its just a shame that it ended the way it did but in hindsight it was the best thing that happened to us. We left it at uni and we have both got on with our lives.
Thats the funny thing about life. Each section of your life has something to leave behind. something that was great but isn’t going to continue into the next chapter. I left school and the girls I was friends with dropped me because I didn’t go to the same sixth form as them…I wasn’t their type of person and I knew that. I left college and the girls I was friends with went off to do other things whilst I went to uni..we drifted apart and I was happier with my uni friends. I left uni and stayed best friends with the 2 girls from my course… I met them in the first week but left behind a lot of other people. Whilst it is sad to think about the people that have been left behind, everything happens for a reason. If that person is supposed to be in your life, they’ll stay or they’ll come back. If the universe pulls you away from someone its because they’re either no good for you or it was meant to happen anyway. You have to thank life and the universe for always helping you out in your hour of need. It may be devastating at the time and make you feel like the smallest person but I promise you, whatever is meant to be will be.
I have recently found myself in this situation. Not really knowing what I ever did you make our friendship end but one thing I do know is that we clearly aren’t meant to be friends and if that is the case then theres nothing more I can do. You just know when something feels right and when someone walks away from you, you know whether you want to fight or not. Ever since the girl from uni, I think about the way someone goes about something and you know when someone really wants to try and make it work and you know when someone doesn’t. Ending it by text, to me, that says it all. Im not going to fight for something thats not there to fight for.
To every friend that I have left behind. Thank you for the memories and the amazing times. I will always cherish the good times we had. I wish you all the best success in your life. I hope you create new memories with new people but always look back and remember the good times you had with the people you left behind.