Im sure growing up, like me, you were told many times that you should always treat others the way you want to be treated. After accidentally saying the wrong thing to someone at school , I learnt more than ever how important it really is to treat people they way you hope they’d treat you back.
This saying works for pretty much every person you meet along the way. If you treat that shop assistant, the old couple who run that cafe, your work colleagues, the people you see every day with respect, in the same way you’d want them to treat you, instantly there is that kind of bond between you. Not anything major but a little sign in your brain which goes, they’re nice person. Something that tells them to treat that person good. I mean it doesn’t work on everyone. But there are plenty of people who will benefit from a smile or a chat or just even a bit of interaction. Whether that be a wave across the room or a simple hello. Its the little things that can show people just how you want them to treat you. If you’re walking past your colleagues or peers everyday with your head down or with blank face and not saying anything. You instantly give an impression which makes people less likely to talk to you. Obviously it depends on the situation and the type of person they are but a little smile can go a long way. Even if you are the one you initiates it.
Throughout the years, I have learnt first hand that some people do not treat you the way you want to be treated. Some will be horrid and shout at your face, some will bitch extensively behind your back, some will not include you in things and slowly push you out, some will even find someone new to befriend and you become an after thought. It happens. Life isn’t perfect and we cant manage how people treat us. I give all I can to be someone that people like, that people want to chat to or even just to be someone that is thought of as being nice. I know that not all people will think this and I know that there is no point trying to be a people pleaser because you just cant be. If you could please everyone, you wouldn’t be yourself. You’d be someone else, a fake version of you, trying to make everyone happy. For me its about projecting positive energy in the hope that it will lift someone. Maybe a little smile or a little chat asking how someones weekend was will just make them feel better or happier. For example, This always helps when you’re working in a team, if someone is down or not 100% it can easily affect the team so by trying to lift their mood by having a conversation about something or even the thing thats bothering them can really help. Even if its a chat about something silly just to make them laugh. That is what is important when it comes to treating people the way you want to be treated.
Something that always seems to bother me is the fact that I often ask how people are or how their day was or how was work. Its a conversation starter but also to show that you’re interested in their life and what they’re doing. I don’t often get it back as much as I give it. It usually comes after a conversation or after I have already said it. I don’t know why it bothers me so much but a simple how are you is one of the loveliest things to receive. It just makes you feel better, it makes you feel as though that someone wants to know about your life. I often ask people how they are because I want people to do it back but naturally not everyone will care enough to ask you how you are every day or how your weekend was.
This is one of the things in life that everyone needs to know the basic rules of. For instance, you may be going for drinks and you don’t invite someone because they don’t like that bar you’re going to so you know they wont come. Therefore you are making the assumption they don’t want to come. ALWAYS ask that person if they want to come for drinks. Even if you know for a fact they will say no every time, there is the off chance that they do actually fancy going out or having a few drinks. If you don’t ask and they see your out and they actually could have gone out but didn’t really fancy it enough to initiate a night out or whatever, it just makes that person feel a little bit disheartened. Weirdly enough can actually make you feel down even though usually you would say no to something like that. I am someone who will often say no to things, I very much know if I’m in the mood for something or if I’m not. Sometimes I think say yes and go but if you know you don’t wanna go, don’t go but there has been many times that I could have gone out or was free all day and could have joined in and would have left the house…and I haven’t been asked. It makes it more disheartening when its a group of people as its not a one to one event. I know not every one wants you to be there or wants to spend time with you which is okay but it doesn’t make you feel fab when you’re at home and see that you could have actually had the chance to join in. This is again something that no all people do, some people just think of themselves and not how you would like them to be towards you. Its just another one of those things that I have learnt to brush off. Its not that you’re boring, its just that they didn’t think about you. As long as you always ask, you know that you are treating people how you’d want them to treat you.
treating people well is something I personally will always try my best at. not everyone deserves to be treated nicely but those who do deserve it, deserve a little smile as you walk past. It really is the little things like that, that benefit everyones day.